Thursday, February 10, 2011

I was told, you want to write, so write

Those were the words from one of my friends mouths on my birthday. I know she is right but I am a procrasinator, low on self-confidence and my brain can never settle on one topic. I was thinking about writing about a conversation I had with a friend of mine about the logistics of two women living together (both heterosexual) and raising their kids. But then as I start formulating what I want to write my mind jumps to another topic related to the first.
Maybe if i write it out I will feel better.....

The conversation about two hetero friends living together rasing their kids came up because we are both pissed at our husbands for reasons too long to get into. So thats one.
I am angry at my husband for past events and issues that are ongoing.
I am angry at a longime friend that dumped me out of her most important day because of issues I was having.
I am angry at my parents for constantly butting their noses in and trying to run my life still even though I have time and time again explained to them that my husband and I dont want to do things their way.
I am angry at myself for not getting a proper full education and now being stuck without a career position to help my family instead only able to get minimum wage jobs that just keeps the bills paid.
I am angry at my family for not respecting my wishes when it comes to my kids, home etc.
I am angry at my old supervisor for being such an incredible bitch so much so that I felt harassed and bullied and left my job.
I am angry at myself for leaving the job because of some chick.
I hate myself for getting really angry at the kids.

Do I feel better right now, no. I feel riled up and full of anxiety. I hope I can let it all go now, I am sending all my hurt and anger out into the world wide web. Let it be with me no longer.
Goodbye bad feelings!

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