Yesterday the weather was a positively balmy 10 degrees, in the middle of February. But Mother Nature has once again brought us all back after tempting us with a hint of spring with -14 degrees today. I was thinking that I for one appreciate and can enjoy spring more because of how harsh the winter gets during January and February. We had two days of spring in the middle of February, lots of sun, warm temperatures, snow melting and the air smelled of spring. I could almost feel the earth quickening and the plants waking. Spring was tangible, it was there and then today we have blizzard warnings and an icy harsh wind. I sit here watching the wind make the snow dance and race across the field. Walking outside the wind takes your breath away and the cold finds ways to reach every bare bit of skin. It makes me long for spring even more.
I was also thinking today about the capacity of love. I have been sick the past two days so have spent my time watching romantic movies and TV. We have an amazing capacity to love sometimes to the point of stupidity. I for one have had my heart broken numerous times and every time I say to myself that's it, I will never be able to do this again. Yet my heart opens again and again with a hope to find a love that will match my love. I know that many women go through this too, so many times we go back hoping that they will change and love us back, so many times we say we are done and yet still secretly hops love will come, so many times we try and try and try again. We stay waiting for things to change while our hearts bleed but there is always a hope, always that small bit of hope that someday we will find a fulfilling love. A love that sustains us instead of drains us.